Of course not all change is bad, per say. There's the change in weather from rain to sun, there is the change in... well, that's the only positive one I can think of for the moment (sorry, glass half-empty me at the moment).
When I was a child I suffered from "Separation Anxiety" as discovered after years of adult therapy. I never liked to be away from my mom and dad, ever. I wouldn't do sleep overs at friend's houses or go away on vacation with them as teenagers. I even remember at an earlier age (maybe 4 or 5) not letting my dad leave when he brought me to a friend's house for a play date. Separation anxiety is a terrible thing for a child because you are too young to use any sort of cognitive thinking. Or in other words, be reasonable about the situation. Obviously my parents were coming back for me! Duh? But for a child, it is a feeling of abandonment without actually ever being abandoned---ok, ok, I'm getting much too deep...back to the point. Change, I hated it---I despised the start of school. I was a social butterfly once I got there, but would rather stay home at the safety of my mom's hip. I'm sure this drove my parents insane. I remember my mom waking my dad up one morning before she sent me off to school and they went round and round with all sorts of bribery in a vain attempt to get me on the bus without crying. My dad worked nights, so there must have been some significance of him jumping on the bribe-your-child-to-go-to-school train! I think I cried everyday until the 6th grade (then I found the thrill of sneaking make-up to school and applying it in the bathroom before school started...hmm). This pattern went on for years and years. Even as a young adult, off to college, I cried when my mom left me standing in the middle of an apartment, I had never seen before (not to mention with two strange roomates) which was to be my home for the next semester. Did I mention this University was only a mere 30 miles from home? (and then I started partying...hmm).
Five years ago when I sent my first son to school, I sat in his Kindergarten room at orientation and watched him color in his red apple (R-E-D spells "red") in his little seat, at his little desk...and I cried, a lot--not tears of joy. I'm sure the other parents thought I was a little goofy. I'm sure a few of them were thinking, "Reserve the crying for the first day when he goes without you." A few weeks later I was having a drink with a friend and this guy approached us. He said, smirk on face, "Hey, weren't you the mom who was doing all that crying at the Kindergarten orientation?" "Oh yea, well what kind of parent of a Kindergartner is out during the week drinking in a bar..." err, umm, oh wait, me. I laughed him off. But obviously, he noticed the pitiful "orientation sobbing." When the dreaded day came and I had to put him on the bus and wave goodbye, I did. Tear free. Well, that is, until I got home and started crying hysterically while folding laundry and thinking, "I can't even go get him because he lawfully needs to be in school." Change = bad.
This year I sent my 3rd child, my daughter, my princess, my sidekick to Kindergarten. Difficult, sadness, anxiety, change. Change, not good. Blah!
My kids don't mind separation from their mother one bit. Sure, they went through the 6 month, 12 months and 24 month separation thing that all kids go through, but they bounced right back. They love sleep overs, and school and they don't fret over change. Thank goodness.
There is one thing that I don't mind changing... that would be... underwear. And that's about it!
Jody
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